Jealousy Read online

  “Can I walk you back to Hawthorne? And will you go out with me next week?”

  I grinned. “Yes and yes!”

  Drew picked up my bags, slinging them over one shoulder. I took his free hand and he enclosed it around mine. Together we walked across the silent ballroom and stepped out into the cool night air. Drew’s hand in mine kept me warm the entire walk across campus to my dorm hall.

  SIT AND SPILL!

  THE SECOND I SHUT MY DOOR BEHIND ME, I ran across the room, grabbed my BlackBerry without even looking up, and started typing.

  “Lauren, oh my God!” Khloe said. She was still in her party dress and had pulled her hair up into a cheerleader-esque ponytail. “Sit and spill! Like, five minutes ago!”

  I stopped typing, looking at her. “I will, promise. I’m BBMing Ana and Brielle first. I have to know what is going on.”

  Khloe nodded. “Totally understand. I’m going to change while you talk to them.”

  I nodded, looking back at the message I had already started to Ana. It was after ten, but Ana was a night owl, and her parents didn’t mind if she texted or BBMed late once in a while.

  Lauren:

  Ana, r u up?

  I sent the message. It delivered, and I waited for thirty seconds before writing again.

  Y didn’t u tell me abt Taylor??? All of a sudden, he was HERE and said u & Bri knew.

  I hit send while the message before it was still unread.

  He said he asked u guys not 2 tell me, but c’mon—girl code! Ana, it was srsly almost the biggest disaster!!! Taylor didn’t just surprise me by coming, but he KISSED ME! U r obvi asleep, so I’ll stop writing. We have 2 talk. Call me 2mrw?

  Still standing, I exited out of Ana’s name and clicked on Bri’s.

  Lauren:

  Hey, r u there? I really need 2 talk 2 u . . .

  I sent the message and waited. The D for delivered changed to an R for read!

  Lauren:

  OMG, so glad u r there!! Can u call me now? Or will parentals freak? If u can’t at least we can BBM. I SO have 2 talk 2 u abt 2nite.

  I kept my finger moving over the cursor to keep my phone awake. I waited to see Bri’s writing a message appear. But five minutes later nothing had changed. My second message was unread, and Bri hadn’t written me back.

  She’s probably checking to see if her parents are asleep, I thought. Then she’s going to call you. That’s why she’s not writing back.

  Khloe came out of the bathroom, dress in hand, and had changed into a neon-yellow thermal long-sleeve shirt and pink flared pj pants.

  “You getting any answers?” she asked.

  I groaned. “No one’s up. Well, Bri read my first BBM but not the second one. I think she’s going to call, though.”

  “I’m sure. If she read your first message, then she’s up. Maybe your phone has a bad signal?”

  I checked the bars. I had full reception. “No, but I’ll turn it off and on in case it’s messed up.”

  Khloe opened the trunk at the foot of her bed and pulled out a plum-and-white-dotted throw blanket. She threw it across her bed and climbed under the covers.

  I turned off my phone and kicked off my shoes. I sat at the edge of my bed and reopened BBM once my phone restarted.

  Nothing.

  Half an hour ticked by before I started my last message to Bri.

  Lauren:

  Going 2 sleep. Maybe talk 2 u 2mrw.

  I punched the off button and put my phone facedown on my dresser. Khloe was reading the latest issue of Celeb Dish when I glanced over at her.

  “I guess Bri couldn’t call,” I said. I tried to swallow the disappointment that I felt from Bri and Ana’s secret keeping. “I’m going to get into pj’s too.”

  In the bathroom I took off my dress and turned on the hot water in the sink. I splashed handfuls of it over my face and washed off my makeup. I pulled on black leggings and a warm button-down orange-and-black-striped shirt.

  When I finally climbed into bed, I was so tired, I could barely keep my eyes open.

  “I feel like I’m dreaming,” I said to Khloe. “I had the best party imaginable, and this crazy thing happened in the middle of it.”

  “I’m so happy you had a good birthday,” Khlo said. “Want to sleep now and save the boy talk for tomorrow morning? Over tea and pancakes?”

  I covered a yawn. “Sounds good. Thank you, Khlo. For everything. Tonight was the best party. You’re the greatest best friend.”

  Khloe’s voice was soft and soothing as she told me how much fun it had been to plan my party and how thrilled she was that I’d had fun. Her voice, making me feel comforted, helped me drift off to sleep before I’d even turned off my light.

  SO LAST NIGHT WAS REAL

  IT WAS JUST AFTER TEN WHEN I ROLLED over and squinted at my clock. The shower was on, and I heard Khloe running lines for her lead role as Belle in Beauty and the Beast.

  I sat up, a smile on my face as I thought about the fact that it was Saturday, Khloe would probably want to trail ride, and . . .

  Flashes of last night flickered before my eyes like an old movie projector had appeared on our wall.

  Masks.

  Dresses.

  Halloween decorations.

  Laughter.

  Music.

  Taylor.

  The Kiss.

  Fighting.

  Drew.

  Dancing.

  Cupcakes.

  Ana.

  Brielle.

  I shook my head, trying to stop the visions.

  Taylor was here. On campus. It hadn’t been a dream. He had really been at my party last night, and I really had to get some answers today. Brielle and Ana owed me.

  I picked up my phone and turned it on. There were two voice mails and two BBMs.

  I checked BBM first.

  Ana:

  I can’t even begin to say how sorry I am. Telling u that over BBM is lame. Check ur voice mail. xx A

  Becca:

  Little sister! (OK, teenage sister) How was last nite? Did Khloe throw u an amaze party? She better have or I’ll have 2 talk 2 her @ Parents’ Weekend. Call me!!

  I pressed the button for voice mail and put my phone on speaker. The automated voice announced the first new message.

  “Lauren, hi. It’s Ana. It’s about nine a.m. and I just got your BBMs from last night.” There was a long pause. “Okay, I didn’t just get them. I read them about an hour ago and waited this long to call. I was scared because I know how mad you must be. I’m not blaming you at all—I deserve it. I think . . . I think you really need to talk to Taylor and Brielle. The phone’s going to cut me off, but I’m here if you want to call, IM, BBM, Skype—anything. I love—”

  “Next new message,” cut in the robotic voice.

  “Heeey! LT!” Brielle’s bubbly voice filled the room. She talked faster than Ana, so she’d probably be able to fit more into her message. Hopefully, an explanation. “OMG, I’m SO sorry about last night! I read your message, went to check on my parents, and started to dial you. My Dad’s freaky batlike hearing must have heard me dial or something! He came into my room and saw me with my phone.” Brielle sighed. “He went through the whole ‘you can’t talk on the phone after ten’ blah-blah-blah speech, and he took my BlackBerry. I tried to tell him that it was you and very important. I mean, hello, it was your birthday, but nope. Anyway, let’s totes talk! I’m home all day. Love you, bestie!”

  I hung up, plugging in my almost-dead phone to charge. The bathroom door opened, releasing a cloud of steam and pumpkin-spice-scented body wash—one of the fall beauty products Khloe and I had bought and shared.

  “Hey,” Khloe said. She wore her thick hot-pink terry-cloth robe and matching slippers. Her long blond hair was up, turban-style, in a teal towel.

  “You been up long?” I asked. I walked over and picked up the bag of birthday cards that I hadn’t had a chance to open last night.

  “I just got up and hopped in the shower. I didn’t w
ake you, did I?”

  “Not at all. How was shower rehearsal?” I grinned at her.

  Khloe opened her dresser drawer and pulled out clothes. “It was perfect, thank you very much. I know all of my lines, and I get more and more excited every day. I can’t wait for opening night.”

  “Me either. You’re going to do great.”

  Khloe smiled her thanks and changed into jeans and a gray cable-knit sweater and started detangling her hair.

  “I had messages on my phone,” I said. “Brielle and Ana.”

  Khloe sat on her desk chair, swiveling it toward me. “Everything okay?”

  I nodded. “It was exactly what I thought last night. Bri got caught with her phone, and her dad took it. Ana called and left a super-apologetic message and said she wanted to talk. I really can’t be too mad at them for this. They’re my best friends—I know they must have thought that Taylor coming to my party was the ultimate surprise. I can’t blame them for what Taylor decided to do when he got here.”

  Khloe rubbed a few drops of Ojon Serum on her hands and massaged it into her hair. “You’re right about that. I bet things will clear up even more once you talk to them.”

  “I’m sure. I’ll get in touch with them later. Right now I just want a break from the whole thing.”

  Bing!

  I picked up my phone and saw a new BBM.

  Taylor:

  Hey, Laur. U still want 2 talk 2day? I’m free whenever.

  “Okay, the break will have to wait a while. Taylor,” I explained. “He still wants to meet today. I was thinking about asking him to meet me at the stable. He could see Whisper, and after we talk, I wondered if you’d be into a trail ride.”

  “That’s only the best weekend idea ever,” Khlo said. “You want me to see if Cole and anyone else wants to come? Or are you in the mood for KK and LT time?”

  I smiled. “The second option, if that’s cool with you.”

  “Definitely.”

  “I’m going to text Taylor and see if he wants to meet in half an hour. I’ll message you after?”

  “That’s perf,” Khloe said.

  I pulled back my covers. “Ohhh, wait. I forgot—we have to clean up the ballroom. There are still decorations on the walls and tables and chairs to put away.”

  Khloe shook her head. “Did you really think I’d let you clean up after your own party? Puh-lease.”

  “Who did?”

  “The guys. Zack, Garret, a bunch of their friends, Drew, and Cole were on cleanup duty. They already texted me that the ballroom is back in pre-party shape.”

  “Aw, that was sweet of them. You really thought of everything, Khlo.”

  Khloe grinned, then stuck out her tongue. “Stop seeming so surprised.” She started clipping her hair into sections to blow-dry, and I picked up my phone. I opened BBM.

  Lauren:

  U up 4 mtg @ the stable? I’m going trail riding w Khloe after u and I talk.

  Taylor is writing a message appeared seconds later.

  Taylor:

  Sounds good. I’m excited 2 c Whisper. When?

  Lauren:

  30 mins? Do u know how 2 get there?

  Taylor:

  Yeah, I actually passed it when I arrived.

  Lauren:

  OK. BBM me if u get lost or something. Wisp’s stall is near end of aisle on left. C u in a bit!

  I exited out of my convo with Taylor and clicked on Becca’s name.

  Lauren:

  Khloe threw the BEST party ever!! Srsly, wait till u c the pix when I upload them 2 FaceSpace. I had an amazing bday . . . and a VERY unexpected surprise. Will fill u in ltr—promise! Love u & miss u! xoxo

  While Khloe dried her hair, I grabbed a single-serving bottle of OJ from our mini-fridge and a raspberry breakfast bar. While I ate, I opened some of my birthday cards. The number of cards was overwhelming. Everyone had done exactly what I had wished for. The cards either held cash for me to donate to my fave horse charity or had a printed screen shot of their donation.

  I pulled a card in a sparkly light-blue envelope from the pile. Immediately I recognized the handwriting.

  Taylor’s.

  I opened the envelope, and inside was a printed receipt for his donation. One hundred dollars.

  “Oh my God,” I whispered to myself. Taylor’s family was comfortable enough to make such a donation, but I knew Taylor hadn’t asked them for the money. He’d spent his allowance—a big part of it—on me.

  The card was gorgeous—black with light-blue swirls and a scripty “Happy Birthday!” font.

  I read his message.

  Lauren,

  Happy Birthday! I can’t believe you’re older than ME! Not fair! I’ll catch up with you soon, though. If you’re reading this card and things worked out the way I hoped they would, then I’m a student at Canterwood too. I’ll always be only minutes away if you need anything. You deserve to have a killer thirteenth birthday, and I hope all of your wishes come true.

  ~T

  I smiled, tucking the card back into the envelope. I couldn’t wait to gather all of the checks and send them to the retired-racehorse charity. I rifled through the pile, picking out cards from Becca, my parents, Ana, and Brielle. But I’d have to read them later. It was time to meet Taylor.

  NOT INTERESTED

  THE FIRST DAY OF NOVEMBER WAS COMFORTABLY cool. I zipped my coffee-colored wool jacket. The frisky horses definitely felt the drop in temperature. A herd of seven or eight horses played, nipping each other’s necks and darting up the hill at a full gallop.

  In the big arena, Mr. Conner was trotting a gray gelding in a large circle. The young horse had arrived a few days ago and was one of the horses that Mr. Conner was training. I knew the gelding’s name was Lexington and that he had been brought to Mr. Conner with only basic training. Lexa said she’d heard that the owner was trying to make the United States Equestrian Team and was too busy training his other, more seasoned horses to work with Lexington. It was Mr. Conner’s job to train the young horse and feel out his potential. I crossed my fingers that I’d see Lexington competing at the Rolex Kentucky years from now when he was much older and competing in the top show circuit.

  I stopped, stepping off the sidewalk and onto the grass to watch Mr. Conner ride. Lexington showed how green he was from his uneven trot to his jerky transition to a canter, but he seemed willing to work. It seemed as though the pair had been at work for a while—Lexington’s coat was steely gray around his saddle pad, and bits of froth from his mouth working the bit flecked against his chest.

  Mr. Conner was a quiet rider—exactly what Lexington needed. The stillness of Mr. Conner’s hands and legs seemed to work with keeping Lexington calm. I watched them for minutes, even though I could have stood there all day. My eyes didn’t know where to look as I tried to follow Mr. Conner’s aids to Lexington. Mr. Conner was the kind of rider that I hoped to be someday.

  Reluctantly I left the pair to practice in private and walked into the stable. I walked down the aisle, oddly quiet for a late Saturday morning, and noted that most of the horses wore light blankets. Almost every horse had their finely sculpted head stuck over their stall door. Necks craned in my direction, and there was an occasional whinny or neigh as the horses talked back and forth.

  Near the end of the aisle, I spotted a bay and a gray with their heads together. It was as if they were using ESP to have a secret conversation.

  “Don’t let me interrupt,” I said, smiling at them.

  Ever, Khloe’s bay horse, swiveled her head toward me. In the stall next to her, Whisper, my gray mare, pricked her ears and let out a soft grunt.

  “Hi, pretties,” I said. I didn’t want Ever to feel left out, so I stood between the two horses and scratched their cheeks.

  “I’m sure Khloe is going to come see you very soon, Ever-girl,” I told Khloe’s mare. “Take a nap—it’s the weekend!” I gave the mare a final pat and moved to Whisper’s stall. Her brass nameplate with her name etched into it h
ad a fingerprint smudge on it. I used my sleeve to wipe it clean before unlatching the stall door.

  “Hi, hi, hi,” I said to Whisper. I put my arms around her neck, hugging her. “You smell so good! I’m so happy to see you.”

  Whisper’s winter coat was starting to grow in. Her sleek gray body was filling out with fuzzy longer hair to keep her warm.

  I looked her over—from big brown eyes and long eyelashes to adorable pink-and-black snip. Each time I saw Whisper, it was almost as if I was seeing her for the first time. It was still hard to believe that she was mine. My parents had surprised me with the gift of my first horse when I’d been accepted to Canterwood. I’d met several horses before seeing Whisper. It had been love at first sight.

  I stood on tiptoes to reach Whisper’s ear. “We’re going trail riding with Khloe and Ever,” I said, keeping my voice low. “But first Taylor’s coming. Here. To talk.”

  Whisper leaned her head into me, pushing her muzzle against my collarbone. “Ohhh,” I said, laughing. “You’re as bad as Khloe! You want details. Well, mon amour, you’ll have to wait until we hit the trails.”

  I rubbed my hand down Whisper’s forehead, over her muzzle, and under her chin. I looked down the aisle. A few students had horses in crossties, and the hot walker had four horses walking in cooling circles. A familiar hat—UConn Huskies—popped into view, and Taylor and I saw each other at the same time.

  I waved and he smiled, heading toward me. I’d given him the University of Connecticut hat after we’d been dating a while.

  “What do you think?” I asked. “Is this stable insane or what?”

  Taylor’s eyes roamed from the stalls, to the loft, to the empty wash stall. “It’s gorgeous, Laur. Wow. This type of space to practice in and keep Whisper must be so conducive to good lessons.”

  “Absolutely. But I don’t want to take away anything from Briar Creek. I learned so much about who I am and what I want while I was there. I’d never be here if it weren’t for Briar Creek and Kim.”

  Taylor shook his head. “I don’t think you’re knocking BC at all. They are both different places with their own strengths that help you and Whisper in different ways.”